STRANGEST PHONE CALL EVER

Okay guys In my line of work I get some really strange calls and requests no biggie.
But this one was the icing on the cake.
So my phone rings I look at the caller Id it says DMC.
I am thinking oh maybe it is 1 of the many doctors that comes to see me.
So I answer and this guy is on the line and he starts to explain his medical condition to me.
the guy is actually in the hospital down in detroit.
He has had several seguries in the prostate area.
He begins to tell me he needs to release. He says he has not had a release in a year.
Now all the while he is talking I am thinking dude u in the damn hospital surrounded by doctors and nurses what the fuck do u think I can do for u.
But u know I still listen to him and let him finish his story.
So the jist of this phone call was the guy wanted me to come to the hospital and give him a prostate massage.
WTF!
But of course all I would of had to bring would have been lube because there are plenty of rubber gloves in the hospital rooms.
[oh whenever I visit people in th e hospital I still all the rubber gloves in their rooms]
But anyway can u imagine me busting up in th ehospital saying all u Doctors I know u gone to school for 15 years but I here now .
I am going to get this patients right.
Move out of my way.
Could u imagin I got this guy flipped over on his stomach I am up on his hospital bed with my finger up his butt and any of the hospital staff walking in on me.
I think I would go to jail.
But this guy has called me several times since.
trying to get me to come to the hospital
maybe he is in the psyche ward.